Five of Pentacles [Reversed]

A Bar—EVENING

I walk into a bar. People wonder why I sit in this depressing place. True, even the sad waitress, Iris never changes.

But right now her shift is over but still. Iris is sitting and drinking.

Iris is talking to other people and ignoring me. Iris is parading her new boyfriend around. Bragging about him. Ex-navy. She thinks he is so cool.

So I loudly talk about how depressed I am and talk about my recent camping trip to outdo the other dudes’ stories. I talk about my recent trip In The Mountains. I camped drunk and miserable. I went sleepwalking and woke up in my underwear surrounded by mountain lions. I didn’t give a shit. Just climbed back in my tent and freezing sleeping bags.

She doesn’t seem to notice my tales. She tells me about how her boyfriend has hurt his back so he is now a security guard, and just sits, buzzing people into a plant.

“At my job I find and protect—!” I yelp I am exhausted, just having returned from an assignment documenting rural village.

She shrugs. Seemingly unimpressed. Not to be outdone though, I start to tell tales of where I’ve been for the federal government and some of the adventures I’ve had. I tell about a war zone I had to pass through on a bus, and had to be armed with an M-16.

“What are you working on now?” Iris asks, slowly being won over. I shrug at my shoulder bag on the bar.

“Paperwork.” I sigh. With no more chance of impressing her, I grab a scotch bottle and hit myself over the head. I fall to the floor.

“Poor baby,” she says and lifts me up, “Can I and walk you home?”

“Perhaps.”

“Does your company ever hire? It sounds fun.”